we have a date(ish)

He finally gave me a rough estimate of when he is moving out. The week after the 4th of July. So this must mean that he has finally found somewhere to move. Now if he actually goes I will be thrilled. I have this terrible feeling though that he won't. We'll see. And if not, then I'm threatening him with court. So we'll see. I'm trying to stay civilized and friendly so that he will go peacefully. He has his daughter and sister still there so we are at my mom's house still, I hate it. I am enjoying staying with my mom, but I hate living out of a bag and feeling so uprooted. So violated. He keeps bugging me to bring L over so that she can play with A. He's being kind of obsessed with it. I don't know why it's such a big deal. HE can play with A, it's his daughter after all. This whole time I feel like I was being used. Used for a place him and his crap can dwell. A place for his daughter to go and have a babysitter, yes, I feel he used L as a babysitter so he didn't have to deal with her. L acts more grown up than his 7 year old as sad as that is. I'm so stupid because I did this same exact thing with Chris only 4 years ago. Why am I so gullible? Such a pushover? I need to work on this. I remember getting angry a while back when there was a post on the Babycenter website from someone saying that they think if you are a single mom you should not date until your child is 18. Honestly, I'm going to go that route this time. I don't need a man in my life. Just my kids. That is what makes me the happiest. I know people probably say this all the time and then end up meeting someone, but I'm really going to try and hold off on my love life until L is 18. I don't need the drama in my life, or the confusion of it all in my kid's lives. I already have 2 a-holes to deal with now, I do not need to add aything else to the pot. My mom's boyfriend threw L in the pool the other day. He was drunk and thought it would be funny to throw a 3 year old in the pool! I just remember running to him screaming, "She can't swim!!". What an IDIOT! I was soooooo beyond pissed off. She struggled twice to get to the surface and finally he pulled her out. She was crying so hard and he was all like, I got her..finally I yelled, "Give her to me". My mom kicked him out of her house. She couldn't even speak to him she was so livid. Now L keeps talking about it and how wrong it was of him to do that. Awe. Poor baby. At least she went back in the pool that day, I was so afraid it would make her afraid of water now. So far my mom and him have not spoken, he did call me and apologize the next day. hm. unforgiveable if you ask me. I can't trust him around my kids that's for damn sure. I find out what I'm having on July 8th! Less than 2 weeks. It doesn't even seem real yet. I honestly hope I can find the strength to raise these 3 babies on my own. It's a scarey thought. Not as scarey as doing it with D though so that is how and why I know I'm making the very best decision for me and my family. My best friend Stacie is also pregnant, about 7 weeks. I think she got pregnant just because I am. She has wanted a baby forever. So she met a guy( a married guy) and they decided to try for a baby. She got pregnant right away and now she's got a whole drama story for herself. He's got twins that are 2 and plus a 1 year old with his wife. Plus he's still living with his wife. Telling Stacie that he will help her out financially but other than that he will stay away. Then the next day calls her and tells her he is buying a house for them to start their family in. He was just in the mental institution last week for having suicidal thoughts and almost acting on them, per his wife. Speaking of his wife, she keeps threatening to kick Stacie's ass and keeps stalking her. What an idiot for him to tell his wife where she lives! hmm what else? She's really got herself in to a not so great situation here and in a way I feel sorry for her but in another way I don't. She wanted this and she went out and got it. I keep telling her to just drop him and she can take care of this baby on her own. I guess we shall see. It's just a soap opera around here lately. Stacie is really not like this at all. She is a very grounded, solid person. She always does everything right and is not a bad seed at all. I don't know where this is all coming from with her. That's all I have right now. Chris has not contacted us at all as of now.

updates

Just want to update on the hearing with Chris and all the bullshit to follow. He showed up. Of course he did! He requested that his child support be reduced because he quit his job so he could go and get his GED in PA. WTF? I wish I could quit my job and go to school, but guess what? I can't because I need to actually support my kids. Not to mention a LOT of my clients work 40 hours during the week and then surprise! go to school in the evenings! It can be done! What a loser that he quit his job to do that. Then in his letter he put that he needs money for traveling back and forth to MI to see his daughter. Whatever, he hasn't even seen her since March and hasn't even contacted us since then either. Anyway, so I brought this all up to the lady conducting the hearing(not sure of her title, but I guess judge will do). I was on the phone for the hearing, because I requested that I do not miss any more work time for hearings since ya know, I am actually working. Oh, and not to mention also the fact that he hasn't even been paying child support for 1 year..it will be 1 year in Sept. and it was court ordered! If it hadn't been court ordered Chris would still have not paid me one cent. One little cool thing in regards to all of this is that I did receive all of his income tax money. That was a happy day. I bought L some more clothes and put $1000 in her bank account for college. I'm sure he was thrilled about that, and I'm sure that is what prompted him to write the court for a decrease in the support he is not paying me. I mentioned most of these things in the hearing. Especially about the fact that he hadn't paid me a cent for the first 3 years of her life and now he wants it reduced? The judge wanted to reduce it by more than half! Said that is what he can afford. It would have been $100/month if I would have agreed to that. Oh wow, a whole $100/month? Thanks! I respectfully objected and so Chris stated he wanted a date with a judge so now we will go in August before an actual judge to dispute this. I wonder if the judge will side with Chris. God I hope not. I have all my ducks in a row though so I really hope he sees my points. Anyway, so then a few days later I get a phone call from Chris. uhh yeah I want to see L today or tomorrow. I say, well I will be out of town this weekend, but tonight L will be with my dad maybe we can do something. Uh no I don't want to deal with you dad I would rather deal with you. Ok well then you are going to have to call me more in advanced notice because I go out of town a lot in the summer so I need to know in advance. Well, call me on Sunday and let me know if I can see her. No, why don't you call me, this is not on me nor my responsibility. It is too on you too, this works both ways you know? No I don't know, please explain how it's my resonsibility to set a time up betweeen you and L? You can call me. Okay if that's how you want to play it then fine, I will call you. hmm I never got a call. Typical I guess. Anyway, D is still in my house and I very much am patiently waiting for him to leave. I want my house back and this is not fair that he is being a slug and not moving out. I hate it. I am going to end up having to take it to the courts to have him evicted and I really do not want to go that route. I am staying with my mom right now because he has his daughter for 2 weeks and his sister because his sister is babysitting A for the full two weeks. I am at my wits end. He is staying in my house with all of his family something is not right with that picture. It's MY house. I own it. I want it back!!!!!!!! I want him and his shit out. NOW! He still thinks that we are going to miraculously get back together. He doesn't realize that I am totally over him and the whole relationship. He keeps saying shit like, I can't believe you want your family tore apart, and how can you be so selfish and you are just like every other woman taking the easy way out..blah blah blah. I'm really sick of dealing with it all. I just want it to go away. I want him to go away. I can't even say it enough. One day I will have peace. I hope. There is so much more, but I'm stressed out now.